We all have our doubts. We all have our insecurities. We all have our trigger points. The part of growing is not only recognizing them, but accepting them and dealing with them and moving past them.
I come across as a very positive person. For the most part I am a glass half full kind of gall. I’m even the I am blessed to have a glass kind of gal. I also may come across as a confident person not an obnoxiously confident I’m better than you person, but the confidence in myself and abilities.
I’ll let you in on a little secret.
Some days I’m not. The trick is on these days (and sometimes it is more than a day) is to push through. It’s not always easy to face things. Some days it is easy to get lost in the darkness. Some days you need to remind yourself to push through. It is easy to unpack and stay as even though it is a dark and scary, it can be easier to stay than move forward. Sometimes it’s hard to move forward, but with each step it gets easier. The more you move ahead, the brighter it becomes.
Some days I think to myself,
“why do I do all these races?”
“What is the point?”
“What are you trying to prove?”
“What is the point?”
Here’s my truth….
I was never athletic. I am not a fast runner. I do not look like the typical runner. I am a middle of the pack runner who has yet to complete a marathon without walking.
I keep running.
Some days I must remind myself that is enough.
Some days I must be mindful not to allow myself to talk myself in a way that I would never put up with from anyone else.
Some days I must remind myself that outside opinions do not matter.
Some days, I must remind myself that I am in competition with no one but myself. That from where I started, I have come so far. That I do this for no one but me. That the point to this is what ever I want it to be.
I’ve been told by more than one person that they find me inspiring. Every time I hear that I laugh a little to myself. Some days I forget that I am not the same person that I was growing up. That I have come so far and further than many people will ever realize.
The trick in not just our training but in life is to keep moving forward. It’s ok to stumble, but each time you do
dust yourself off
get moving again.
PS – I went out for 8 miles today:)