Complicated

Complicated Relationships

I have lots of complicated relationships. To be honest, who doesn’t?

I love my blog, but I have not been great about blogging recently…… Complicated

I love to run, but haven’t been running much lately……. Complicated.

I want a clean house, but I hate to waste time cleaning it….. Complicated

I want to be a size 8 or honestly I would take 10 at this point, yet really don’t do what is necessary to make that happen…… Complicated.

I miss running with my friends, yet don’t seem to have the time to meet up with them as our schedules don’t mix….. Complicated.

I have a VERY complicated relationship with food. To be honest, who doesn’t?

The problem I have is the all or nothing mentality and often we might be the ones complicating things more than they need to be.

As I previously mentioned, I’ve met with a nutrionist a few times now. She has given me some good feedback. We have talked about different food choices, adding more protein to diet and less carbs, and looking at better options overall. Things that most of us all know, but she has given some good tips. Overall it has been worth it.

Here is the complication though……. While I know everything she says is valid, I am beginning to wonder if I have the conviction to actually follow through. So far the answer to that will be a resounding no. I can’t even get myself to track my food choices for a day or two. Now maybe it’s because I know where I’m going off track and I don’t want a paper trail to remind me. Maybe it’s because I’m not determined enough to follow through. Maybe….. Maybe….. Maybe….

There are so many reasons we don’t reach where we think we want to go and I maybe to the point where I, honestly, am not sure I want to got there anymore.

I just had my physical in December. Cholesterol only went up 4 points and blood pressure is still really good. So while I have all the other stuff with my Hypopara going against me, relatively everything else is looking ok.

So now the questions I need to ask……

What do I really want and what am I willing to do for it?

Simple.

Yet, complicated….

Answers will be coming shortly and probably changing as time passes.

Am I Ready?

Oct12

I’ve been trying to answer this question. To see where I am. What my body can do. What mentally I am prepared to do. I think I have the answer.

Am I ready to run a virtual NYC Marathon?

Hell no.

Am I ready to complete 26.2 miles for Sandy Hook Promise for a NYC Virtual Marathon?

Yes…. With in reason

I need to be smart. I need to be reasonable and most of all…… I need to check the ego.

This past Sunday, I went out with one agenda. Ok maybe 2. To plan my route which will consistent of “loops” from a local park. I am hoping to have people join me for parts of the “race” and thought this would be a great way to do it. There will be loops in the park going out to longer loop leaving park. This way some can come for shorter or longer distances. I went with no pace plan. No time frame. No nothing. Just the loops and to hit 13 miles.

I did it.

Not too shabby either

How you ask?

By not being an idiot. Ok, anymore of an idiot than thinking of finishing a marathon. I walked. I ran slowly. I walked. I stopped at my car at end of first loop. I stopped to rub feet. I refuled. I took my time. I had no… I need to be faster. I need to hit this pace. I should blah, blah, blah

I just did it

I did it knowing that I could do it. I did it knowing that I could do more. I did it knowing that my body has done this again. I did this with the thought never again….. but maybe I just mean a virtual. Most of all I did this knowing that honestly there will come a day that I can’t do this, but (blank) no, that day is not today. So I will do this.

It will be hard. My feet will hurt. My hands will swell. I will be tired. I most definitely will be sore. I will be slow. I will like every marathon question my wisdom, BUT I PLAN TO FINISH WHAT I SET OUT TO DO!

So the date is set, October 22.

The time is set…. Starting at 8:30

The pace is what it will be.

The reason is clear……… I am running for Sandy Hook Promise and the promise of a better day for our children.

https://fundraisers.hakuapp.com/christine-chaillet-1

Here’s the Plan!

Oct2

I have not been living up to the hype.

I have not been doing what I should have been doing.

Some might say, that I’ve been slacking.

Maybe I have.

Maybe I have not.

I’ve really just been doing what I can to get by. Could I have pushed myself to do more? You bet! Did I want to? Eeeee….. a little but not enough to actually push. I’ve been really tired lately. We all are collectively tired. We all have responsibilites. Things that weigh on our minds. Things we know we should do, but don’t. Things we want to do, but also can’t. It is a vicious cycle.

After a hard reset where I am consulting with a dieticion, asking myself hard questions, and actally trying to put the pieces where they belong not necessarily where I want them to fit, I’ve come up with some ideas.

Here is the thing, if you know me you know that if I set my mind to do something; I am going to do it. If I make a commitement, I will see it through. Most of all, if you know anything about me; you know that Sandy Hook Promise is my jam. You know that as much as they need supporters like us, I feel the very real need to be part of the solution. (You can read about why they are important to me here….https://www.sandyhookpromise.org/blog/volunteer-resources/holiday-reflections-from-a-promise-leader/ )

So here is the deal, I am not ready to run a marathon. Virtual or not. I think part of my issue also is that being virtual, I let things slide that I would not have if I knew I would be at a start line with 50,000 people. Although I’ve done virtual marathon before that I was ready for, this year was different.

Here is my dilemma….. I said I was going to do it. I want to do it. I am committed to doing it. So I am going to do it. It won’t be what I imagined but it will be what is “smart” and what I physically think that I can do if not just a little out of my reach. Isn’t that what a marathon is all about anyone. It literally may take me all day to do it, but I will do it.

Now even though my training has not been stellar, that does not mean I’ve been sedentary. Remember I just completed a Sprint Triathlon. My runs may not have been long, but my cardio fitness is strong. Today due to the rain, I took it inside……. 90 minutes on stationary bike. Biking just under 30 miles. Then an hour on treadmill for just under 4.5 miles. So not a couch potato. I also felt like I could have kept going, but there were things to be done today.

I also just ordered new shoes, because I realize that I’ve been wearing and running in LAST YEAR’S marathon shoes. Not good. Shoes should arrive in another day or so.

So here is the plan…..

4 six mile loops at the park. I will ask my local peeps to join me for a loop, for a portion of the loop or just cheer me on from home. I will do some running. I will do a lot of walking. There will be some instagram/facebook posting. Hopefully there will be no crawling or crying but you know, it is a marathon. Anything is possible. In looking at the guidelines for the virtual marathon, it just needs to be one continuous run in Strava completed in 24 hours.

Easy, Peasy. Lemon Squeazy….

Oh wait….

Probably not, but it will be what it will be.

But it will happen and I hope you are there in any way that you can be. Also feel free to share my fundraising efforts with your friends and family, because as we know their efforts to bring change are needed more now than ever!

https://fundraisers.hakuapp.com/christine-chaillet-1

Been a Minute

Jul9

So my last post about unmotivated seemed to start my summer theme, but…..

It’s been a minute and I thought I would re-introduce myself and my new motivation.

Hello there!

My name is Christine and I think I am a runner?

I think….

But I am also a home baker busy with my new Cottage Food Baking business. Baking, researching, practicing, plotting.

I also work part time outside the home at a child care center. If you have ever worked with 3 year olds, you know that it is exhausting in a fun kids are too cute way.

I am also a home maker. Although 1 of my boys is a college graduate this past June and now in the work force, I still have one more college student at home and a High School student.

I also have Hypoparathyroidism which makes everything a balancing act.

I love to garden.

I am a busy, busy, bee….

I am also a blogger? At least think I am. I’ve written many a blog posts in my mind never to have actually made it to WordPress. I hope to change that. I hope to change a lot of things. So with that let’s catch up!

Although I haven’t been blogging or training, I have actually been moving (somewhat). I’ve been pretraining training. For what you ask.

I am running the NYC Virtual Marathon for Sandy Hook Promise. Those of you here a while know that I had made it to the in person marathon team for the 3rd time, but this year gave my spot up for a few reasons. I was at peace with that. Then Uvalde and I wanted back in. So I am now ”running” and raising money for Sandy Hook Promise as part of a virtual marathon team. Even though it will still be 26.2 miles, the pressure is off.

You can support my fundraising efforts here – https://fundraisers.hakuapp.com/christine-chaillet-1?fbclid=IwAR02hdj0avNFAMl3Ygl6bfu77vtYo03Sr0bSttsji_YwetlCUFZMB5BUMVc

Now before entering to do the virtual marathon, I had already signed up to do a Sprint Triathlon. This is one that I have never done, but have wanted to do. Sprint Triathlons have a special place in my heart as my very first race was a Sprint Triathlon – The NJ Iron Girl.

This was the race that started my crazy journey. That I started blogging to share my progress. That motivated me to run and made me realize that I actually like running. That got me where I am today because I cross trained and liked it which is the main reason I liked the idea of jumping back into a tri. Although I do not enjoy the swim as much as others. The swim will be in the bay at LBI. It also requires training. I always say with a tri…. The bike, you can coast. The run, you can walk, but the swim….. you will drown. Not really because they always have safety measures, but you get it.

So I have been pre training. I’ve been doing some biking. Still running sporadically, but really no swimming except some laps at the summer pool. This will all change next week…….

Because my training plan will officially start and I will be off the couch and out the door!

Decisions…..

May7

Decisions are hard.

Sometimes we think we need to do something, but the thought of it brings worry.

Sometimes we want to do something, but the thought of the task at hand brings us anxiety.

Sometimes we know that what we want to do is maybe not what we need right now, but we worry we will miss out if we don’t do it. FOMA is real.

Sometime we know that the job is important, it is a worthy cause and necessary but we must realize that there might be others who can take it over while we take care of ourself.

We make decisions. We change our mind. We change it again……and again…. and again…..

So here it is and to some of you it will come as a shock.

I filled my application out to run NYCM for for the 4th time for Sandy Hook Promise. As I filled it out I second, third and fifth guessed the wisdom. I guessed not because I do not believe in their mission of protecting children and bringing much needed change because I do. I guessed not because I have not seen the impact of their programs because they are real. I guessed not because they are not an amazing organization with amazing leaders who are making a difference and giving it all they have got because they all are.

I guessed because I wondered if right now it is what my body needs. I guessed because I don’t know weather I can mentally and physically push myself to train for a marathon. I guessed because I am not sure that it would be a smart thing to do right now for so many reasons. With all of these guesses, I still filled out my application to run for them because I believe in them so much. I was accepted to run and all I needed was to fill out the contract to be on the team.

I was in!! The thought did not bring me peace for all I mentioned above.

Then an email came that they had an abundance of runners waiting in the wings, so instead of sending in my application; I passed the baton to the next runner. I always said that Sandy Hook’s mission was not a sprint but a marathon. I just forgot that it was a relay marathon. So as I pass the baton to the next runner, I realize that when the time is right I can step back in my lane to get the baton again. Until then there are other ways to both support those now running with the baton and the mission itself of Sandy Hook Promise.

The biggest way I know it was time to pass this baton is that when talking with a friend who was shocked I wasn’t going to run this year, I realized that I was at peace with the decision. There was no second guessing. There was not third guessing. While at peace with it, it is very bittersweet as I will miss being part of the marathon team but you don’t need to run a marathon to make a difference. You just need to show up and get involved.

Just Doing My Thing

Apr14

As seems to be my MO, I ran another race I was not trained for this past weekend. This time when I say that I wasn’t trained, I mean I really wasn’t trained! Training was lagging, but I was on track somewhat especially as I had just come off NYC Half. I had put in some miles with the longest being 8. I was feeling good, but then I was sidelined by the cold everyone seemed to get after remerging from out masks. This was a cold that would not quit and then turned into a lovely sinus infection. So for the 3 weeks before the Shape Half Marathon I did nothing. Like seriously N O T H I N G. Unless you count blowing nose constantly and sleeping something which I don’t think counts.

I had thought about backing out, but not seriously. I knew that I would finish but I would have to just take it as it came. Although if I had remembered how hilly 2 loops of Central Park were and how Harlem Hill sucks so bad, I might have given it more thought. I had no plan. I had no pace. I just went with the flow. I was lucky to even show up. As a side not right before I left my home, I threw up. It was a combo of taking my antibiotic with coffee followed by brushing teeth. It didn’t set well.

The flow was wobbly. I ran the first 10 with the same woman that I ran the first half of the NYC Marathon. Since I didn’t have a plan and we are similiarly paced, I went with hers. She was run walking with a 5 to 1 ratio. It wasn’t pretty but it worked. the last 3 miles we went our own way which meant that she ran/walked and I pretty much walked. Central Park is a hard run when not trained…. ok any course is hard not trained, but the hills of central Park are no joke. My quads were not laughing but I was…..

This is what its about…. Not the pace…. Not the medal….. not even the finish….. the friendships:)

The day was filled with lots of fun, laughs, and a lovely brunch. I am so glad that I showed up. Sometimes that is all you have to do is show up. To know that what ever will be will be and just enjoy the process and the outcome. It is easier said that done. Will also say that I was surprised at the outcome because I finished in under 3 hours which I was not expecting. 2:55.

More to come……

Ready or Not Here I Come

Oct31

Training for a marathon seems to take forever. From the moment you sign up, you start thinking about what plan you are going to follow. Then it’s actually implementing. Even harder yet….. Sticking to the plan.

So here we are 7 days out and it will be what it will be.

Am I ready?

Surprisingly, I feel ready. I did not follow the plan to the letter T or probably not even close. That being said, I still feel ready.

Shocking I know…. But I do.

I think the biggest thing is that I really adjusted expectations. I adjusted what I thought I should do with the reality if what I might be able to do. Most of all, I know that if I am not an idiot, don’t go out too fast, and do what I need to do the finish line will only be 26.2 miles away.

Easy Peasy lemon squeazy

Ok, not at all but it is in reach. I have trained. My legs have done it before. Mentally I am in the right place. I am looking forward to it.

So now this week it will be putting the finishing touches on the logistics. It helps that I have reached my fundraising goal for Sandy Hook Promise too. That takes some of the pressure off.

Last week I had a bake sale. Have I mentioned that I LOVE to bake. I also LOVE to share baked goods and message of Sandy Hook Promise. I just about sold out. Had lots of generous donations and reached my goal….. That makes it worth it.

More later this week, but just wanted to let you know I’m ready as I will ever be. Today final “long run” at only 10 miles. Went with some friends and was a good run. It’s always nice to end with a good run. This week some short 3 milers to keep legs loose.

Catching Up

Sep3

It’s been a bit since we chatted. It’s been some crazy time, but thought I would pop in to say Hi as every time I think about it something popped up. So in no particular order some random thoughts to catch up.

My older boys went back to college leaving my youngest the only one at home. Although to be honest, my oldest was only home for about a week this summer as he completed an internship this summer as he is a Senior in College this year. My middle one started his Sophomore year but to me it seems like his Freshman as it really is his first year on campus thanks to Covid. I admit that I love having all my boys home, but I am happy for them. There is truth to the expression, “The days are long but the years are quick.” Sniff…sniff. Sniff

Training has of recent not been what it should but it what it is. I am planning to get back on track which getting back to a normal schedule will help. We all need a normal schedule. Work has been a little chaotic as of late which has contributed to my lack of training. Extra hours. Different hours. More physical hours. I kept saying that I would run/bike/something after work and then after work…… Nothing. With under 10 weeks to go, I will have to get my ass going or it is going to be handed to me come November 7th.

I have been asked more than once if I think that NY is going to happen. I must admit that I’ve had tha thought pass through my mind more than once, but I do think it will move forward. It does seem like they are doing almost everything they can to ensure an in person safe event. Although I readily admit that I would love for them to make vaccination a requirement and I’m not sure why they haven’t. New York City requires it for many things but not the biggest event to take place in their boroughs? Maybe they will but I think it’s getting too close for them to make that decision. They are making changes though. You have to make a scheduled time to pick up your bib which I expected. I do have heart palpitations though of thinking of beginning of race, but I am fully vaccinated. If booster is available, I will have it before NY. I also plan to mask up at start and finish areas. It is concerning but not worrisome.

They NY medal picture has been released and I LOVE IT! Hard to believe that this will be my 4th NY and my 9th overall. I am counting last years virtual because then that puts me to my 8th year streak of “running” a marathon. As the saying goes…. I’ve come along way baby.

Ida…. Ida…. Ida

This week I had planned to get back on track with training. Then Wednesday instead of training, I was in save the basement mode as we were taking on water. Then yesterday it was clean up the basement. Today is watch the basement dry and tomorrow it will be put it back together. Up and down the stairs. Lifting with the knees. It is cross training and that is how I must look at it.

So now it is time to fall back on my favorite expression…….. It is what it is.

100 Days……

Jul31

100 days is so far away, yet so close. 100 days till NYCM. 100 days to worry if my training is not enough. 100 days to doubt if my body can handle it. 100 days to worry about what is going on with the new Delta Covid Variant and how this will all play out.

On top of that…..

100 days to fundraise. 100 days to spend as much time fundraising as I do training. 100 days to continue to remind people of the good work that Sandy Hook Promise does that only happens with fundraising. 100 days to remind people that while I do love running this race is more than about running. 100 days to hit my goal.

Is there anyone who doesn’t take on this challenge who doesn’t question why they are doing it, if they should be doing it, and how you can do it better.

Now don’t get me wrong. Training is going good. Although I have already had some foot pain which is concerning. This are things that lead to doubt. These are things that make me realize that I need to go see my podiatrist. More just to make sure that there are no issues and to see if it is time for new inserts for my shoes. I just don’t want to deal with foot pain all through out training and I did have that pain after running only 8 miles. So there is concern.

One thing that I hate to admit as I’ve had issues with my feet 20 pounds ago…… The extra weight is not helping when it comes to my foot health. It’s not so much the weight but the weight combined with being prone to having issues with my feet is not a good combo. Although this time the pain was different. It was on the outside of my foot, so I wonder if something else is going on. And while I know the easy solution is to say….. I’m going to loose 20 pounds. That is much easier said than done.

So the reality is that I’m not going to loose the 20 pounds. Unless I plan to go on a very strict diet (which I won’t), I need to figure out some things out.

Should this be my last marathon (thats a hard one)

Do I need to see my podiatrist (yes)

Is it time for new insoles? (Not sure)

Do I need to focus on foot strike and form (maybe)

GRRRRRR

I really need to not bury my head in the sand like I’ve done in the past and takle this head on. Although I do like to ignore things till they blow up in my face. (Doesn’t everyone or is that just me?)

It annoys me too because this go around I am doing everything that I should be doing. But for now, it is not something that is bad enough to cause me to stop. Besides I already have some ideas – like to spend some of my “foundation runs” with biking. To make sure to spend stretching and just listening to my body.

100 days……..

Slow, Steady & Moving Foward

Jul12

One week in and 17 more to go, but training seems to be falling into place. Just so happens that a woman in my running circle is also planning to run NY. We are off similar ages and abilities. In talking to her, I explained the 80/20 plan that I am doing. She decided that is a good fit for her and the beautiful thing is that it seems like are fitness level and training zones are compatible, so it’s a go. We are doing slightly different plans, but we can make it work.

I forgot how good it was to run with people. I haven’t really done it in a long time even pre-covid. When people are training seriously even if they say “I will run whatever you are running,” it doesn’t always work out. They aren’t getting the training they need. You feel bad for holding them back or maybe worse run too fast which is worse than running too slow. So finding a training partner for a marathon where you can do many runs together is nice. Even better when you really like the person:)

So week one went well. I will say that holding back is harder than it sounds. All your life you are told to give it all you’ve got. ….To push yourself to the limits…..If you don’t push yourself who will. ……. I’m sure you can think of others that you’ve told yourself. It is always…. GO….GO…. GO.

Now it is…. Slow down. Don’t push it. Slow and steady. It’s harder than it sounds. More times than you would think this past week, it was “we are running too fast.” We need to slow down. We are breathing too hard. Now don’t get me wrong, with the heat and humidity in Jersey this past week slow and steady still was hard. The heart rate spiked a few times. Sweat happened. It was not “easy.”

Here is the thing though….. After this first week of running, there was not a run that when it ended I didn’t think that I could do more. I could run further. I could run faster. I also was able to recover from these runs which is key.

So as I dig deeper into this training, I really need to find out if the zone that my garmin is saying are the right zones. I also would love it if my heart rate didn’t seem to jump up quickly. To keep myself where I needed to be and bring my heart rate down, I would walk until I got back into the zone. So I need to work on this. It will come.

As I do this, I am also in the marathon of fundraising. It’s kind of like doing 2 marathons at once. I’m working on collecting auction items which after this last year you can imagine is not easy task, but onward I go. I’ve gotten some good ones already. (If you know of any, I’m all ears).

So onward I go….. Slow, Steady, and moving foward.

https://fundraisers.hakuapp.com/christine-chaillet?referral_source=FBK&fbclid=IwAR0hDi2YckF6MScs8cg0fWgEQIlVnLPodGb7–v1u6cb3sKDQjgWrhRWS7E

The Accidentally Running Mama

Run, Bike, Swim and Have a Life!

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