Tag Archive | hypoparaathlete

The Load is Heavy

Mar28

This post is for my Hypopara friends……

For those of us who have been waiting and waiting and waiting….. and yet again waiting for them to resolve the Natpara issue, this last week was a kick in the gut.

For those of you who have never heard of Natapara, I will give you a very brief unscientific explanation. For those of us who live with Hyopara (Hyparathyroidism), it a nutshell it means our parathyroid glands do not work or work properly. Never heard of a parathyroid? Well that’s because it is one of those things that the body usually never has a problem with. Most (not all) of us came to the Hypopara world due to a problem with thyroid surgery where the parathyroid glands (there are 4) were damaged. At least that’s how I got here. Your parathyroid glands produce a hormone that is responsible for helping your body regulate calcium levels. Not a big deal you think, until you look at this chart.

Anywho……

For a brief moment, all of this was secondary because I got to be on Natpara, a daily injection of the synthetic parathyroid hormone. I was on it for a blip before it got recalled. My body worked the way it was supposed to work without a barrage of pills, self checks and symptoms. I also no longer worried about my kidneys since all levels than were in normal range. Then for reasons that really don’t make sense, this option was taken away. When I say doesn’t make sense it is because it is still available in others parts of the world, just not in the US. So back to daily routine.

Whatever……

As the saying though goes though….. Just because I carry it well does not mean the load is not heavy. It is heavy. Sometimes you get so used to carrying the heavy load that you forget it is there, but it is always there. You stop really speaking about it because you just do what you need to do and even those in your circle don’t see the struggles. Always lurking. Waiting to remind you that it is there. It is those moments that are frustrating. I also know that I am lucky because even with my Hypoparthyrioidism I am able to accomplish and do so much.

But for now, I know that many in the Hypopara community have no choice but to keep carrying our heavy load because we all got notified that Natpara is not coming back. It makes no sense to know that there is something out there that will take away the symptoms, help to protect kidneys because we were no longer taking high doses of calcitrol and calcium, where your face doesn’t start to tingle telling you that your calcium is dropping (that’s what mine does but everyone is different), your feet uncontrollable cramp up, or have muscle spasms in legs. Just sitting here waiting for the other shoe to drop as you deal with the life of hypopara……… because in the end

What choice do we have

especially when the only viable one was taken from us.

Plugging Along

Mar26

Plugging along. That’s what I do…….. It’s really all any of us can do. Sometimes it is hard to keep going. Sometimes it’s easier. What really doesn’t matter is how fast, how slow, or even how hard you push. What matters is that you keep going.

I remember when I ran my first big race, one of my kids asked me if I was going to win. I told him not a chance and that I was just training to be able to finish the race. One thing that so many people get stuck on is what is the point if you can’t be the best of the best. The thing is they are missing the point. You don’t have to be the best of the best. You just need to be the best version of yourself. No one can do you better at being you than you.

So often in life we let what others think of our accomplishments diminish them. We compare ourselves and when we do that often we do not compare ourselves favorably. We ask ourselves the wrong questions – Why can’t I be as fast as xyz? Why can’t I run as far as xyz? It’s bad enough when we do this with our running, I won’t even get into when we do it in other aspects of our lives ….. But…….. But……But…. What if instead of asking how we compare to xyz, we ask

Am I being the best version of myself?

Am I doing what makes me happy?

Am I doing all that I can?

These and only these answers are in our control. These answers we can realistically and honestly answer. These are questions that if we don’t like the answers, we can evaluate and change so that eventually we get an answer that we want. We have no control over so many things in our lives, but we do have control over the way we react, what we do and how we live our lives

Case in point –

I was texting with a friend about my blog today. She made the comment, “I think it’s because it’s relatable. It’s not some picture perfect mom or athlete”.

When I started this blog it was to share my progress as I trained for my first (and supposed to be only) Sprint Triathlon. I shared what I learned as I learned it. I’ve never pretended to be more than I am….. I middle aged mom trying to do the best that I can. Sometimes my best isn’t what I want it to be, but it is what it is.

So here I am a few months into 2021 trying to be the best version of myself. Trying to find the sweat spot of running with Hypopara while being realistic. I have not been happy with my running. Not because I wasn’t running fast enough but because of the way I felt after and during. My new approach after my break has been much better both mentally and physically. I can realistically say that this month I will hit the 100 mile mark for running/walking with most of those miles being running miles. Even better, I have done these miles in a way that is best for my body.

Remember that we can only do what we can do and sometimes the best thing we can give ourselves is the gift of time to re-access, re-evaluate, and most of all just keep plugging along because eventually you get where you want to go.