Tag Archive | Encouragement

Living an Authentic Life

When you live an authentic life, you will have to deal with haters. Some you know in real life and some you only know in the virtual world. Not really sure why that is except maybe they are not living as authentic life as they pretend to be. Now I’m not saying that just because I live an authentic life, I put everything out there. Frankly, I don’t. Frankly, I don’t think that everything in my “real life” needs to be shared online especially because my blog is about my fitness journey. But as far as my fitness journey goes, I put it all out there pretty much. I think I’m up front and honest about my goals, my training, accomplishments, and even my failures. Failures are part of life and anyone who pretends they have never failed at something obviously didn’t get out of their comfort zone.

I’ve been out of my comfort zone since I got off the couch.

Then there are the people who like to throw the stones. These are the people who have something to say about everything except about themselves.

Starting on this journey 3 years ago was a major step for me. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I was by no means the athletic child. In my family, I was the heavy one. I still remember the time my doctor put me on a diet and I was trying to sneak an extra packet of oatmeal for breakfast. The horrors! I’ll be authentic and honest and say that growing up I did struggle with confidence, self-image, and whole host of other issues.

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Yup,

I’ll be honest, I don’t anymore.

It’s not that I think that I have a perfect body or am the best. In all honesty, there is no such thing as perfect and those who strive for perfection will only end up seeing the flaws anyway. It’s sad really. I reached the point in my life a long time ago where I realized to just accept myself for who I am. You know what? There are a whole slew of people that not only accept me but think I’m pretty swell too. I like me and that’s good enough for me. I am who I am now because of who I was then. I have the drive and determination that I do now because of the struggles that I had then whether those struggles were real or self imposed.

I will honestly say that I have changed since I started running. I’ve said it before. I, also, think these changes have been positive for not just my health but my life in general. It has brought so much to my life and I can not see a point in time where running won’t be in my life in the future. It has become part of my life. It is not just something that I do. It has become part of who I am.

I am a runner.

Yes, there will always be those who do not want to recognize the changes and will continue to try to put you in the box you used to be in. It bothers them when you go against what they expect of you. Yes, there are those who can not accept that you are allowed, encouraged, and supposed to grow and change in life. It is the process of life. The past can not be changed. It can be accepted or used as a reason to not move forward. I choose to move forward.

Do you live an authentic life?

Best Marathon Signs

Oct29

We’ve all done the long lonely training runs. We can all admit that they suck. Part of it really is not the running, because we all love that or we wouldn’t be doing what we are doing. Now I’m not saying that anyone has woken up early for a training run and thought, “I am so excited to be running 18 miles.” If they have, these are the people I worry about. We do them because we know that we need to do them. We do them because we are looking at the bigger picture. We do them because if we didn’t, we know that we probably won’t reach our goals and might not cross the finish line.

Somehow though running all those miles in a race is different. It’s actually easy to figure out.

The excitement of the start line.

The comradery of the everyone else lined up with you.

The bling at the end!

Cheering families along the course

Cheering strangers along the course

Great motivating signs!

I had all of these during MCM. I wish that I could have taken a picture of some of the great signs that I saw along the way. Being as I was running my heart out, I didn’t stop to take any pictures of the signs along the course.

First I MUST mention the Blue Mile. For those of you not familiar, this is a group that is dedicated to honoring our service members for their sacrifice and to remember all that was given. Their slogan is Wear Blue to Remember and you can find out more about them here. This was a VERY moving mile at about the half way point of the race where the have signs with pictures, names, age, and where the soldier died. The runners around me all went through this mile quietly. I know that as I looked at each the signs that I passed, I reflected on all those lost lives. So many. So young. Broken families. I wanted to cry for them. I wanted to run for them as a way of running for those that could no longer. Then at the end of this reflection, you depart into a sea of American Flags held by volunteers many of you know are there for personal reasons. They pumped you back up with high fives, cheers, and just being there. I can honestly say that this was the most memorable mile that I think that I have ever run in my life.

There were the other signs along the race. There were more than a few that made me laugh out loud. For real! So I thought that I would share them. For obvious reasons, I did not get any pictures of them as I was kind of busy running. So these pictures will have to do…

Then there were these two…

RUN TO FROM CONGRESS

YOU FEEL LIKE CRAP, BUT YOU STILL LOOK GREAT!

These are much, much, much better than “You’re almost there” which we all know is a lie!

What was your favorite race sign?

You Want Me To Tell You What!?!

Oct16

We all have goals.

We all have dreams.

We don’t always verbalize them though and put them out into the universe.

Even someone like me who seems to tell everyone more than they want to know. There is just something too scary about doing that. When I ran Philly, I had a goal in mind, but I really didn’t tell anyone. I did say that I would like to finish in under 5 hours. What I didn’t tell anyone was that in my mind, I really wanted to finish around 4:45.

Guess what?

I finished Philly in 4:46:20

Guess What?

In my mind, I wanted to finish around 4:45. I told that to no one. It was between me, myself, and I. It was less scary that way. This time apparently, I have to put it all out there. Now, I don’t mean here on the blog out there. I mean I have to tell my coach. She wants me to start thinking about and tell her Monday the following:

A: The dream race on the perfect day goal

B: the hard but doable goal

c: the day sucked but I’m still happy with my race goal

In my mind, I know what I would like the answers to be. I’m just not sure If I want to lay it on the line like that. My Coach says that this is her way of making you stay accountable. I’m not sure that I want to be accountable. She also said that A does not need to be feasible YET or it can just be something that is possible but ambitious. I think I will go with the later. I also have to be careful because if I put too ambitious of a goal, she might think that’s what I want to run in the NYCM next year.

So I think I know how I will answer these questions in my mind. I just need to see if I have the nerve to write them for her.

Do you say your race goals out loud?

How About Them Apples!

Sep6

I went for a run today. I know that is just shocking! The thing is today’s run was actually a thing of beauty. Now, I don’t mean that I looked spectacular while running because I’m pretty sure that never happens as the below is probably closer to the truth.

What I mean is that there are runs where everything just seems to come together and it is a thing of beauty. Today was such a day. To be honest, today was the type of run that I needed. We all know that I had let the doubts creep in, but this last week I’ve seem to push them aside. I’ve had a couple of good runs, but today was the money shot. Today was the all feared, all dreaded cut-down. The bane of my existence. A run that if I flubbed again would get inside my head.

I was ready for it. I kept reading my coaches email with words of encouragement. I read and reread a blog post she did called One Bad Apple. That post really helped because it made me realize that I was not the only one who did this and that it was up to me to remember the good runs.

I went into this run prepared.

I went into this run with the confidence.

I went into this run knowing that I could do this.

I remembered all the good runs that I had leading up to it. I knew that I could do it. I knew that I had done it in the past. I knew in this instance the only one holding me back was me. I also knew that I would need to change the way that I was going into these runs. I had to stop psyching myself out and instead look at them as the challenge they are supposed to be. Life without challenges would be boring. You may be shaking your head no, but think about it. What happens when things become to easy, you get bored and move onto something else. So I needed to take this challenge and go with it. I needed to steer into the skid and just enjoy the ride.

Not only did I hit all the paces that I wanted to, but I did them while feeling great doing so. Some runs you may hit your target pace, but it just feels so hard it makes you wonder why you are even doing it. Some runs, you do let it get to you making you doubt yourself. Then some runs the stars align and it all just seems to come together to remind you that this is what it is all about. These are the runs that must be held onto when the doubts creep in. These are the runs that we should remember. No not every run is going to give you the “runners high,” but you need to hold onto it. You need to internalize it. You need to remember.

It really is easy to let one bad apple spoil the bunch.

I found it more than a little poetic that I literately came across this apple towards the end of today’s run. It was almost like the universe was giving me a sign. It may have just been an apple that someone threw out their car window, but either way it was a reminder that are a whole lot more good apples waiting to be had as long as you don’t give up.

I’m not fooling myself into thinking that just because I had a great run today that my training is going to be easy or that every run is going to feel this way. I’m pretty sure that after my 16 miles tomorrow, I won’t be feeling so good BUT

I will remember

and

if by some chance I forget;

I know there will be people there to remind me.

Do you remember your good runs or your bad runs?

Stepping Out Of The Comfort Zone!

Jul14

So I had a funny conversation with my son yesterday before we left to go swimming at my Mother-In-Laws. I had my new bathing suit on and this is the conversation that I had with my 8 year old son.

Him, “Is that a new bathing suit?” (This boy misses nothing and I will warn his future wife)

Me, “Yes.”

Him, “What are those lines on your stomach?”

Me, “They are from you and your brothers when you were in my tummy as babies.”

Him, “Ok. Can we go to Mimi’s now?”

When we get there the boys immediately go in the pool. Me, I like to sit and get nice and hot before I go in. So, I’m sitting there with my cover up on and finally get to the point (very quickly as it’s really hot) where I’m ready for a swim. I take my cover up off.

Guess what happens?

Nothing!

The earth did not open up and swallow me.

The birds did not stop chirping.

Not one of the people at the pool looked twice or thought twice about my suit.

I might just wear it again:)

Then another funny thing happened.

Even though I posted it here on my blog for the few of you who actually read my posts (although the FB share button does show that this post was shared a few times! Who did that?). I also shared in the closed FB group that started this all. Then my friend Dawn encouraged me to share it on our local MRTT page. We are always sharing our sweaty selfies after our runs. It was a leap to share it there because I knew more people would see it there than here, but I did anyway. The response was overwhelming and amazing.

There were many positive comments and a few who commented that they couldn’t wear a two piece and that I was braver than them as in my post I did say truthfully I was trying to be brave. I will tell you something? Each and everyone of those Mama’s could so rock a two piece and I’m not sure why we all think we can’t.

My favorite comment though was

“ I like your power pose! You’re rocking that body, that suit and LIFE!“

Now, I did not post the picture for likes or compliments. Honestly. I did it as a way of empowering myself. To step out of my comfort zone.

You know what?

It was worth it!

Yes, I know that there are “mean girls” out there who may say things about me wearing a two piece bathing suit, but I don’t think I care anymore.

In talking to another friend who said my post was inspiring, she commented on how she thinks about what her own self consciousnesses will do to her daughters. Children do learn not just from what we say, but what we do. They see so much more than what we give them credit for.

So I encourage you to step out of your comfort zone to see what happens.

It might just surprise you!

Diving Right In – Slowly!

Jul13

So if you didn’t notice, I have what you call on “online presence” to say the very least. I belong to a few online running/exercise groups with a few of them being intertwined.

In one of the groups a discussion began regarding the ESPN Magazine Body Issue. Not that I’m a prude, but Ok can we have a body issue that their not naked. Ok, maybe I am a prude because the pictures are tasteful, but still. Now this post isn’t about ESPN magazine, so I will just share the link that opened the discussion or just Google ESPN Body Issue.

Anyway, the discussion and conversation evolved into more than just the athletes but body image as a whole. Then women in the group started sharing pictures of themselves from races, swimsuits, and just empowering images. I even shared one of my race photos. It was one from the NJ State Sprint Triathlon. It was a day that I felt that I wasn’t at my best, but yet I still crossed the finish line (actually in not a bad time). Yes, you can reflect on what you could do different and learn from it, but every finished race is an accomplishment. Ever race that you start is inspiring. No matter how bad a race is once you cross the finish line you can’t help but know that you’ve accomplished something.

Reading their inspiring words and seeing their inspiring images gave me courage. For all my swagger, I still have very poor body image. Yes, I can run a marathon. Yes, I will do a Triathlon, but ask me to put a swimsuit on and I might just run the other way. Why is that? I mean there are people of ALL different body types wearing just what they want. Their confidence amazes me. I look at pictures of me crossing the finish line at the Gortex Philly Marathon and I think, “Damn, is that what I look like from behind” and not in a complementary way.

Philly Marathon Finish

Well I decided it was just time for me to dive right in. That is usually how I get into all my races, so why not do the same with my bathing suit. No real thought process. Just sign up and let the chips fall where they fall. So this morning, I went to my favorite store (Athlete – like you didn’t know). I have been eying this bathing suit since I first saw it in the spring. Didn’t buy it because “I don’t have the right body for it” I’ve got stretch marks. I’ve don’t have a flat stomach. I don’t have on hourglass figure. Blah, Blah, Blah.

I do have a body though and it’s up to me what I put on it.

I bought the suit.

I’m going to wear the suit:)

Sometimes:)

Word of the Week – Mile

Jun17

Definition of MILE

1. any of various units of distance: as

a unit equal to 5280 feet — see weight table
nautical mile

2. a race of a mile

3. a relatively great distance, degree, or interval —used chiefly adverbially in plural <was miles ahead of them in education>

Yes, a mile is a physical distance.

Yes, we often ask other runners, “How many miles did you do?”

Yes, sometimes one mile can feel like a never ending distance.

Yes, sometimes we get caught up in the numbers of them.

And

yes, some people can run an amazingly fast mile leaving the rest of us in the dust.

BUT

As one of my favorite and oh so truthful saying goes….

I will never see the day where I come remotely close to a 6 minute mile, but I can still run a mile. I can actually run a lot of miles now. Although when I first started, I couldn’t even run a half a mile. Truth be told, I probably couldn’t run a quarter of a mile. Now my normal runs average about 4-5 miles and the mileage is only going to go up as I begin marathon training. What I once thought was impossible to do, I do on a regular basis. I am not saying this to toot my own horn (toot, toot), but to encourage you to push yourself to do what you think might be impossible. Little by little. Day by day. Chip away at the things holding you back and you will be amazed at how far you can go!

Don’t forget that each mile good or bad is a blessing.

Enjoy the air in your lungs, the sound of your feet on the pavement, and enjoy the view.

Us runners are a lucky group:)

What is holding you back?

Word of the Week – Badass

Jun10

If you’ve been around running for a bit, I’m sure that you’ve either heard the word of even used it yourself.

I think on any given day, any of us can be a badass. I know that there are various degrees of being a badass, but that does not take away from yours on any given day either. We need to just recognize this trait in others, but also in ourselves. We need to take pride in what we do. A lot of the time instead of embrassing it, we do the opposite. We talk it down.

Oh, it was just a 5K

I only ran a mile.

I came in last

I came in the middle.

Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah

Yes, there are people that we know that doing amazing things. Things that we can’t even imagine doing. Things that we may never even want to do. That’s ok too.

We need to embrace what we are doing and take pride in it. Now I don’t mean that we should go to the opposite extreme and think we are the best thing since sliced bread which we can all admit is awesome. We just need to recognize that we may not be the fastest, strongest, or go the farthest; but that doesn’t take away from what we are doing.

On the best of days, running is hard. Getting out the door is hard, but we get it done when we need to.

That is enough:)

Are you a BAMR?

Word of the Week – Determination

May27

determination

noun de·ter·mi·na·tion \di-ˌtər-mə-ˈnā-shən\

: a quality that makes you continue trying to do or achieve something that is difficult

: the act of finding out or calculating something

: the act of officially deciding something

Many things in life do not come easy. Yes, there are those few people who seem to achieve all their goals with minimal work, but the key word there is “seem.” Most things in life require work and do not come easy. When setting your goals it is important to know yourself. To know what you expect from yourself. To know what your capable of and dream of what might be out of reach. I think most importantly though, you must admit to yourself how determined you are to meet those goals.

You have to ask yourself a couple of tough questions:

What am I willing to do to meet my goals?

How much effort do I really want to put into them?

Am I willing to give up anything to get where I want to go?

These questions really pertain to all goals we set in life regardless of weather they are our fitness goals. Once goals are set then it is time to put in the hard work. When it comes to our fitness goals, not everyone will understand our drive. Some may even think we aren’t all there . Some might unknowingly try to sabotage them by telling us that it’s ok to miss a run, a workout, or what not.

This is why is really is important to have friends with similar goals. They understand if you can’t make a breakfast because you’ve got to get your run in. They will encourage you to skip your shopping trip (unless it’s for new running shoes) to get your workout in. Yes it is fine to miss an occasional workout or run, but the problem is that it is very easy to go from missing one to missing a week.

That is where determination comes into play.

How determined are you?

How important are your goal?

Determination is the key to meeting your goals. Determination is what will get you out the door to run when all you want to do is meet friends for coffee. Determination is what will get you to the finish line.

Now please don’t think that just because I’m determined to meet my goals that is all that I focus on. It isn’t. It just causes me to shift my priorities slightly and maybe causes me to go for my run and then stop in for breakfast afterwards.

Not everyone will get your choices and that’s ok. As long as you make the ones that you are comfortable with. Your goals are yours and yours alone. This is why it is key to surround yourself with those people that are just as determined as you. They understand. They encourage. They don’t think your crazy and they understand your determination because they are determined too!

How determined are you?

Pass the Kool-Aid Please

May21

A friend of mine who recently got back into running after being on the track team in college has been toying with the idea of running a 10K. She’s already run a couple of 5K’s which she has rocked, but she thought maybe a 10K would be a good challenge. I’ve been trying to talk her into a half pointing out that I had only run a 5K before my first half. She then pointed out that she is not as crazy as me:) That being said, she wanted to run a 10K as the next challenge and she wanted a medal. Very doable goals.

The next race on my calendar in the NYRR Oakley 10K in NY City.

(I must interject to add that this advertisement for Oakley includes one of my MRTT Mama’s from last years race. Don’t they look like they are having a blast!?!)

It starts by the park, but it is not the 2 loops through the park event that many of their Central Park races can be. I will admit that running through the park is not always a picnic as there are some pretty decent hills. I’ve never run Oakley, so I really can’t speak of what the course is like. To be honest, I’ve signed up for most of my races not giving the coarse a second thought until I’m preparing for the event. Maybe there is something to this crazy thing my friend speaks of….. No, no, no.

Anyway, most of the MRTT Mama’s that I ran Brooklyn with are running Oakley. Then there seems to be a bunch of others running this one too. So I “encouraged” my friend to sign up for this one. Some may say harassed, but I will go with encouraged! Thought it would be a fun event for her to do and I think running your first “big” event with friends is cool. She was concerned because the day of the event is the same day as the end of the soccer season for our kids. As much as a planner I claim to be, she is what you call a real planner! This maybe why she is an actuary. Anyway, the way I sign up for an event is that I see the event, I sign up for the event, I put it on the calendar and everything else just falls into place even if I have to shove a round peg into a square hole. My husband also doesn’t know what or where I’m running till I tell him. Now the question has become, “Do you have any races this weekend?” Now, I’m not racing nearly every weekend (even if it feels like it), but this system works for us. My friend pointed out that this system would emphatically NOT work for her and her husband. I get it. I get it. That did not stop me from telling her to sign up. Hey, I knew this race would sell out which it did. That being said, she did do what was right for her and her family. She talked to him first and still was able to get in under the wire and sign up.

I think I am more excited that she is doing this race than I am! I can’t wait and I’ve already secured her a seat in the clown car. It is going to be such a fun day and I can’t wait for her to experience it. She doesn’t realize it, but this is how it starts. SHHHHH, don’t tell her and when you, my friend, read this I’m only kidding (maybe:)

There is something to be said for the mob mentality. Now, I am by NO means saying that my MRTT group is a mob, but we do like to pass the kool-aid.

Should you sign up for a race?

Of course!

Should you sign up for another one?

You bet!

But I’ve never done one before you?

You got this?

Yup, we are an encouraging group. Yes we are:) That being said, we do also do tell each other to rest when need be. To train smart. To be healthy. We not only tell you that you can do something, we will also help you do it too. Just remember that we will be there with you from start to finish and we’ve got your back.

The Accidentally Running Mama

Run, Bike, Swim and Have a Life!