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Fake It Till You Feel It

As the weekend comes to a close, I’m working on recovering from it.   I went it to it not really thinking that I would need to recover from it.  I was signed up to run my first trail marathon.   I hadn’t trained like I was running for a marathon.  I hadn’t blogged about it at all.  Outside a few of my running friends, I’m not sure anyone knew I was supposed to do it.   I was very ambivalent about it.   To the point that my coach sent me an email the day before asking how I was feeling and also addressing the fact that I had been VERY quiet which she let go because of the holidays.

My reply to her really held no clues as to what I was going to do or how I was planning to do it either.

“Yeah, I know I’ve been under the radar lately with this trail race.   Things seem to be settling into the normal crazy routine.   I’ve probably been quiet because I’m really a bit ambivalent about this weekends event and really even today just planning to see how it plays out.   I’m thinking because this is not one of my goal events for the year and it is also a place I frequently run at that is causing the lack of excitement.  I also am going into this knowing that even though I could probably run the marathon distance,  I won’t if tomorrow I feel like it’s going to cause me problems for NYC Half training.  This is not to say that I’m not going into it not wanting/planning to run the full.   It just means that I plan to listen to my body.   In saying that I am do not mean that I am expect it to be a piece of cake.   Again, very ambivalent. “

I’m sure after she read my email, she scratched her head and was wondering why the Hell she is coaching me.

 I really was planning not to plan and just do a wait and see approach.   That being said though, I did decide to pretend that I was really going to run a real race.   I carb loaded the night before with some yummy Mac & Cheese and chicken served with a side of bread.   I packed my bucket for the event.   Yes, a bucket.   It was a great suggestion from a running friend, Mary, whose hubby is a pro at these things.

I got to the event and met up with my fellow MRTT Mama’s and friends.   We took the required pre-race pictures!

NJTrail

We were all running different distances, so we  only got to cross the start line together.   I’ve run all my big events by myself.   I’ve also done many of my training runs by myself.    Even so, I still didn’t know what I was going to do.   Part of my mind was thinking that I would just do the 30k and be happy with it.  Part of my mind thought that I might even settle for the half and recognize that was ok especially since I hadn’t been running tons in December.  Then something changed along the way.

Now what changed me from being ambivalent to actually running a marathon?   I’m not really sure.   I think what helped was that in the very beginning I met a fellow runner who I was able to fall into not just a good running pattern with but I was able to chat away the miles with.   She has her own amazing story which isn’t mine to share, but I will say that she has run over 40 marathons, 50K’s, 100 milers.   She is a true Ultra runner. More importantly she was someone who  made the miles go by easily.    So we ran almost 3 laps of the 4 needed for the marathon distance.    She was stopping, but I felt strong.   I felt like I had more in the tank.   Also my mindset somehow changed from ambivalence to “I want this.” I was so close how could I stop?

I recently had a conversation with a friend who had lost her Mojo about how to get it back.   With the New Year, she was starting back with her running.   She was doing it, but her heart wasn’t in it yet.   I told her that she just needed to keep going until one day she realized that she once again had found her Mojo.   I told her to fake it until she felt it and I guess that is what I did at this trail race.    Sometimes, you just need to show up for the magic to happen.

Since I went into this event with no thought, no plan, no idea; I had no pace or time in mind.   So when I ran it, I just ran it.   I wore my watch but I really didn’t pay any mind to it other than when it would beep the miles away.    That being said, my laps were consistent.

Lap times – 1:29:53, 1:29:48, 1:42:57, 1:47:13

I even stopped at the end of lap 3 to take a picture or my running buddy and then some more pictures on the trail.

 

In the end, I am glad that I went as I really had thought of bailing.   The trails as always are beautiful, peaceful, and bring me happiness.  In the end, I am happy with my official time of 6:30:08.   My actual running time according to Nike+ was around 6:18 which I can’t believe.   It boggles my mind to think that I ran that long, but numbers don’t lie.   It also gave me a big confidence boost for the Dirty German 50K as even though I was VERY happy to have finished, I felt like I could have gone more.  Maybe not happily, but I could have if needed.

It was a good day all the way around.   I am so glad I went and I’m even happier that I finished especially when my running buddy Dawn puts it like this about me, she “is always pushing me to take more chances and to go for it. She put her money where her mouth is with a great marathon at Watchung!”

And truth be told, I couldn’t do it without the encouragement that I get from my running and non running friends.

The funny thing is when it was all over both Dawn and my Coach were not surprised that I did the full as that was what I originally wanted to do.   Dawn said I’m too stubborn to back down and my Coach just said that she knew it.

Have you ever gone into a race not caring about the outcome?

What to Do? What to do?

I’ve been thinking a decent amount about what I would like to accomplish in 2016.   The more I think about it, the more I think I’m going to simplify and streamline my goals this year.   While I LOVED the Bib a month challenge, I don’t want to put that type of pressure on myself to have to do an event.   This is not to say that I won’t be doing events, I just want to do what I want to do when I want to do it.

So what do I want to do?

Speed has always been my problem.   I’d like to say it’s my little legs as I’m only 5 foot 2, but that really is a cop out.   I think I need to go out of my comfort zone and push myself this year.  I mean really push myself as there have been times after an event I wanted to kick myself because I felt like I could have done more.   So this year, I hope to do that.    I hope to push myself to the point where it’s uncomfortable.

comfortzone-crop

  1. My first big event of the year will be the New York City Half Marathon.   I’m going to throw the gauntlet down and say that I would like to do this race as a sub 2:00 event.   I don’t care if it is 1:59:59, I really want this.   I hear amazing things about this course.   I know NY crowds are awesome.   So this is the place I want to do it at.
  1. Then I plan to build my endurance up and slow down to train for the Dirty German 50K which I already signed up to do in May.   I have no time goal for this, other than I want to finish it.   I want to have fun with it and I don’t want to die doing it.   Seems like a good goal to me:)
  2. Last year I didn’t run a lot of 5K’s.    This year since I’m not chasing the 9 plus 1, I would like to do more.   Since I’m already chasing a sub 2 half, I would like to see if I could chase that 25 minute 5K.   We will see.   We will see.
  3. Then lastly, I want to run the NYCM STRONG.   I want to finish this race knowing that I gave it all I got and couldn’t do anymore.    Ideally, I would like to do this in 4:30 WITHOUT walking.   I don’t know why the walking bothers me, but it does since it is not part of my plan.
  4. Lastly, I want to stay healthy.   I want to reach these goals without injury or pain outside of the normal pain that comes with running these distances.
  5. Oh and while doing all of this, run 1000 miles again for the year:)

I think that is enough for this year.

I think that is more than enough for this year!

What are your 2016 goals?

 

Another Year Down

As I plan for 2016, I paused to look back on 2015 and I have much to be proud and thankful of with my running.  Sometimes I still can’t believe how far I have come.  Sometimes I still can’t believe that I am a runner as that is not something I ever could have imagined.   I am not the same though.   People evolve, grow, and change.   Even so, sometimes I forget that.   Believe it or not some days,  I still struggle with calling myself a runner which is kind of head scratching when I look at my running history.   Last year alone, I ran many events including a marathon.   On top of that I ran 1000 miles.   Yet with all of these miles, I still struggle to call myself a runner.  I might be a little mental…..

I’m not fast enough.  I don’t know enough.   I’ve walked in both marathons that I’ve completed.  ect, ect, ect.

Then I remind myself that none of that matters.    If any of my running friends said these things about themselves, I would shut them down.   The same should apply to me…

I am a runner because I say I am.   I am a runner because I run no matter the pace or distance.  You don’t need to be the fastest to be a runner, you just need to be running.

Year

This is one of the reasons that I display my bibs, medals, and running pictures in my office area.   It is a reminder to me of what I can accomplish if I dare to dream and I tend to dream big:)  I also did a decent job of completing some of my goals for 2015.   I didn’t complete them all which I’m ok with because I completed them all in one year then my goals weren’t challenging enough.

Here is the run down…

  1. Complete the 9 plus 1 for NYCM entry – Check.   Not only did I complete it, but I had such a great time doing it!
  2. Run a Half Marathon in 2 hours – Nope.   This one didn’t fit into my training plan as I was working more on endurance not speed.   This year it will be back on the table.
  3. Complete the Iron Girl with better time than last year – Didn’t meet this goal which really wasn’t a surprise as I did not train enough on the swim or the bike.   I think this race will now be delegated to a run event where time doesn’t matter.
  4. Run my first trail Half – I did this one well before I realized I would.   I ran in in January and it was a surprise to me:)
  5. A Bib a month challenge –  With chasing the 9 plus 1, this one wasn’t that hard to accomplish. The hardest month to complete was actually February as February races in the east are hard to find.   I ended up doing a virtual race with my MRTT group.   Although I did add the Jingle Bell Jog in December to finish it off.   Normally, I would not race in December.
  6. Run the MCM – Semper Fi!!    Would love to do this one again as it really was a great event.

Now time to reflect on goals for 2016.   Some I can’t believe I’m not only dreaming about but already signed up for such as a 50K!     But that’s for another day.   Today is a day of refeclecting.   Tomorrow is the day for planning:)

How did you do on your 2015 Goals?

 

Do you make resolutions or goals?

I am not a person to make resolutions.   I’ve tried in the past and realize that they just aren’t for me.   I never keep them and I know I’m not alone in that either.   You start off good with your resolutions and it’s all downhill from there.  Statistically only 8% of people actually keep their resolutions.   I know I was usually one of them.   I admit that over the years I made many resolutions to get healthy, to eat better, to exercise, ect, ect.    I’m not sure if I even made it to February.

Now, I will say that what for me works is goals.  This is what I need to have to stay on track.  I started all of this with the goal of finishing a Sprint Triathlon.    I also made this goal in September not a New Year’s Day goal.  Having a goal kept me honest in my training.     Having a goal made it harder to quit when I may have wanted to especially when I told everyone what my goal was.  For me, I need a goal which usually is an event.

As we begin the New Year I will evaluate last years goals to see which one’s I’ve accomplished, which I would still like to strive for, and what new goals I would like to set.

It may sound similar to coming up with resolutions, but in my mind it is a totally different thing.

Here is why…..

Simple Definition of resolution

  • : the act of finding an answer or solution to a conflict, problem, etc. : the act of resolving something

  • : an answer or solution to something

Simple Definition of goal

  • : something that you are trying to do or achieve

To me it’s clear cut…..   A resolution you are looking to solve a problem, but with a goal you are working towards something.    With a goal it is more tangible.   It is the difference between saying, “I’m going to start eating better” or “I want to be able to loose 10 pounds.”   Although, I really don’t worry about the weight, my goals are more…. I want to run x miles in y minutes.    In order to do so, I must do xyz:)

I like goals.   I need goals.   That is just the way I am wired.    So this week, I will be focusing on these things.

What are your goals for the New Year?

 

 

What to Do? What to Do?

I’ve been hitting the trails the last few weeks.   Well I’ve got there at least once a week for 3 weeks.   You know what?   I forgot how much I loved running on the trails.   I forgot how different running on the trails is from running on “Satan’s Tar” as Dawn refers to the roads now days.    Running on the trails reminds me of where I grew up where my playground was a mountain.   Literally.

I find that running on the trails takes you away from it all in ways that running on the roads in town really just can not.

Here are some examples of why.

Trails2

trails3

 

I guess it’s good that I’ve been getting to the trails and plan to go more as I am really only a few weeks away from my first race of 2016.    Although I signed up for the trail series marathon and am training as such, I really am not 100% sure that I will run it.   I will run, but I will see how that day goes.    The beauty of this trail event is that it raises money for battered women’s shelter.   You pay the same entrance fee no matter the distance.   It is a very low key event and I guess I am treating it as such.

Now, just because I say that I am treating it as a low key event doesn’t mean that I am not serious about it.   I am.   It is just that I do know that I really did not give myself a lot of time to train/plan for this event.   I signed up for the marathon distance, because on any given day I can go up to the trail and run 12-13 miles.   Case in point last week, Dawn and I went and ran 2 loops of the pink trail.    So for me signing up for the half would just be a normal run.   This is why I signed up for the marathon distance.    It’s not something that I would do every week or am even sure that I can do right now.   It is a challenge.   You know me.   I love a good challenge.

I am plan to go into this event with the intention of running the marathon distance, but we will see what happens.    No matter what happens, no matter what distance; I will be happy to be on the trails:)

Have you given the trails a try yet?

Where is your happy running place?

 

 

 

100

Over the summer while gearing up for major training, I joined an online challenge to run a 100 miles in one month.   I figured if my coach could run 100 miles in a day, a whole month wouldn’t be so bad.   Besides, I was getting close to it and I though it would be  good incentive.    In the heart of my training, I actually had a few months were I was over 100 miles.

Now normally I do not like virtual events like this, but to me this one was different.   It wasn’t like running a virtual race.   It was just about putting in the miles which I did.    I maybe not always happily put them in but put them in I did.

I had forgotten that with this virtual challenge, I would also get a “belt buckle” even though they put it on a ribbon.   It came this week with a t-shirt.    I like it.   I like it a lot.

100 Miles

Now honestly it is not the most beautiful medal hanging up, but I appreciate it.   One of the reasons really is because there will come a time (not anytime in the near future) that I won’t be able to run 100 miles in a month and when that day comes I will have this to remind me of the things I have been able to accomplish.

Who knows maybe one day I will have one of these for a single event.   Just kidding, Dawn:)   Although, you just never know!

 

Have you ever done any virtual events?

If so, why or why not?

Friday Five – He Said What!?!

Friday Five Link-up with by Eat, Pray, Run DC,   Mar on the Run, and You Signed Up for What?

Today’s Theme

5 Bucket List Vacations

That being said, I’m going a different direction today, so if you want to find a spot for your dream vacation this isn’t the post for you.

BUT

If you want to know,

TOP 5 WAYS TO RUN SAFELY

this is the post for you.

I’ve been thinking a lot about running safety this week.   I’ve been thinking a lot about the drivers on the road this week.   I’ve also been thinking if I wanted to do this post this week and here is the reason why.

My town like many has a community Facebook page.    This post appeared in it this week.

Rant

Now, I also thought a lot about whether or not I wanted to post this comment as anonymous.   I try to teach my children the internet is FOREVER and you have to own up to what you put out there.   Really,  I know this and yet I still keep this blog.  Up until right now, I thought I would post with his name, but I don’t think it is necessary.   Maybe he was having a bad day.   Maybe he was blowing off steam or my personal favorite maybe he is something a woman might use on a Summer’s Eve.

This post bothered me on sooooo many levels as I think that it would for most rational people, but I will tell you what bothered me most about this post.  In my community there really were only a few people that called him out on his words.   Most gave him the “he said it with sarcasm” get out of saying hateful things card.   I don’t.   You shouldn’t either.    Call me Pollyanna, but I just think that there are just some things that should just not be said.   EVER.  I also think people need to be called out on their hateful words.

It also bothered me because more people than I care to admit acted like a mother running with a stroller was doing something wrong.   That is beyond as asinine assumption and these people really should get out on the road themselves to see why we are all addicted to it.   There were more than one person who chimed in.    Again not many people called them out on this.   My one friend (yes you) said that’s because the haters are more likely to jump in and others don’t want to get in the mix even if they disagree.   I’m not one of those people.

Now even though his post was deleted either by him or the group moderator, his words and others could not be deleted from my mind.   I’m a bit of a positive person and the fact that people can behave this way really makes me sad.   The fact that there are people who can even in jest say these things makes me angry.    And most importantly the fact that these same angry people are behind the wheel scare me.

So without further ado….

5 Ways to stay safe while running.

  1. DO NOT WEAR HEADPHONES!   Yes, I know that you don’t listen to your music loud, but just don’t wear them.   I listen to music but it plays though my phone.    If I am on a closed course, I will wear headphones.
  2. Wear reflective clothing, bright colors, or something to make you stand out.  You should see some of the things I wear running.
  3. Keep your eyes open.   When I say this I mean watch the oncoming traffic, look for driveways that may have cars ready to pull out.    Just generally pay attention to your surroundings.
  4. Always run towards traffic on the side of the road.   Be ready to jump.   Yes, I know that this is horrible, but it’s a fact of life if you run in the roads.   People are distracted.   I’ve said it in previous posts like I see you do you see me.
  5.  If running at night wear blinkie.

Lights

What are your running safety tips?

Have you ever come across an angry driver?

So This Happened…

26.2

I’ve been off the radar for a bit.   Not intentionally.   It really is just that life has gotten crazy busy and with Christmas coming it is bound to get a little more crazy.   That being said, I’ve not stopped running.   Yeah, running.

I actually just ran the local Turkey Trot.   Lots of my fellow Mom’s Run This Town Mama’s were running too.   That always makes for a fun time.     This is a nice event.   This is one that is nice because it’s a good course that you can just run for fun or run to push it a little bit.   Mostly flat and it happens to be in the neighborhood where I do many of my runs.   I actually said that to myself while I was running.   “These are my streets.”

I had decided going in that I was going to push myself a little bit on this course and just run.    Run, Run, Run.    I had no goal time other than I wanted to know that I was pushing myself a little.   I almost went out too fast as with most events everyone runs full speed out of the gate.   If I hadn’t intentionally slowed myself down my first mile would have been in the eights which would not have done well for the next four miles.   I kept it in check and just made each mile a little faster.   Then the last mile, you come back into the park and I just took off.   I was only able to do it because I knew it was the last mile.    I had very pretty splits and I was very happy with the way this race turned out.   I even placed 13 in my age group which means next year I have a goal of breaking into the top 10:)

Turkey Trot

Turkey Trot2

Had a great time and so glad I was able to do it this year.

Then I did something that I’ve been thinking about for a bit now.   I signed up for a 50K.    It’s not till May which is perfect as the NYC Half is in March and it won’t interfere with the NYC Marathon training either.   I’m really not sure how I went from saying that I was only going to run the NYC Half & Full next year to adding more races other than that is just the way I roll.

DirtyGermanFinishlogoweb

So signed up I am and I think I’m good for the year now:)

or

that’s what I’ll tell myself today!

Do you live outside your comfort zone?

You’ve Got To Want to Make It Happen!

1484103_622769931126137_927190818_nWe all know what we are supposed to do to be healthy .   Balanced eating.   Right amount of exercise.   Yada. Yada. Yada.  It’s hard to get motivated sometimes.   It’s hard to get moving sometimes.     Even after getting into the routine, sometimes things happen.   Sometimes you loose your mojo to keep getting out the door.   Sometimes, you run your goal race and your are content to skip a few runs.

It happens.

The trick is finding out what your motivator is and will get you back on the road.   To each their own.   Now mine is signing up for events.   Hard events.   Events that I’m not quit sure I can do.   Events that I have to prepare for.   Events that might even seem crazy to some.    I am at that point.

Now, I’m not sure how this happened as I am pretty certain before I even finished Marine Corps Marathon I said NY would be my last and I would call it a day.    Then some time passed and even though not really enough to make me forget.   I think I may have gone a little crazy because I was toying with th idea of signing up for a 50K in January.

It was pointed out to me by a few people though that I do have a slight obsession with Christmas and a January 50K could interfere with it.    So not the fear of the 50K, but the fear of messing up my Christmas plans made me reconsider.   So I didn’t sign up for it.   I, instead, signed up for the Trial Marathon.   Figure, why no?    Besides, if I find it’s too much I will just stop.   Although, I’m hoping not to.  I will also admit the fact that there is total lack of bling made me think twice too.

So I’ve taken next year that was supposed to be only about running the NY City Half and Full and have already put some big events on the radar.   First the trail marathon in January. Then the NYC Half in March.  Followed hopefully by a yet to be signed up for 50K  and then the NYCM.   I’m also pretty certain 2016 will bring other events too.

So although I need running in my life for my sanity and such.   Without these things in the pipeline, I might not be as dedicated to training as I should be otherwise.

What motivates you?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Get Out of My Head

Before I started marathon training with Caolan, I would have been very happy with today’s run.   On face value, my run looks good.   The problem is I have been training and running long enough that I am very disappointing in it.

 cut-down cut-down2 Yes, on face value this is a very nice run.   The problem is that this is not the run I was supposed to do today.    I was supposed to do what my coach calls a cut-down AKA as a tempo run.  I was prepared for this run.   I had the perfect route mapped out which was relatively flat.    I had my paces written out, water bottles filled, and Garmin actually charged.

cutdown3Yup, on paper it seemed like I was ready to go.   The problem was that I needed to get out of my own head yet again.   I’ve been hitting my paces on my normal runs but for some reason when it comes to my cut-downs I think I freak myself out.   These paces just seem too fast for me and I think that I choke and stall  on my run (yet again).

Today the heat came back and I should have gone out for my run early.   The problem was that I have been getting out early a lot lately and I was still recovering from my early than earlier volunteer position.    Then I had to take my son somewhere this morning at 8:30 not getting back and ready to run till 9:30.    I should have scrubbed the run and done a blinkie run, but I thought I still had time to beat the heat.   It really wasn’t that hot yet and I went for it.

I started off ok with the exception of my damn quads (yes, still).   I stopped once I warmed up a little to stretch them and my hip flexors which also seemed to be in need of some stretching as well.    Then it went down hill from there.   I kept going, stopping, and going.   Once I hit mile 5, I had a planned stop for a convenience  store to get water.   I opted for Gatorade hoping for a miracle.

At this point, my pace was better, but not on target which I had already given up on hitting.   I stopped watching my watch and scrubbed the run as a cut-down.   I had nothing to do but think about all the things that went wrong with this run, what I could do in the future, and wondering why I was doing this in the first place.   My main conclusion was that I really just talked myself out of being able to hit the paces before I even gave myself a chance to hit them.   I need to figure out how to not let these runs mess with my mind.    It’s a work in progress.

I also thought about how even though I have run a marathon last year, this is the first time actually  marathon training.     I think that since I am not following a generic training plan but a plan designed for me;  I know that I should be able to do the things assigned to me.   I know that my coach knows what she’s doing.   I know she wouldn’t be giving me these paces if she didn’t think I could hit them especially since I have hit them in the past.   So I have to figure this out.

Tomorrow is another day.

Tomorrow is another run.

I won’t give up.   I will roll my quads.   I will stretch.   I will do what I need to do.   What I won’t do is give up.

commitment