When I wrote my last post about taking the rest of the year off, I really did not know what type of feedback that I would get. I mean this is a running blog. I have a lot of amazing running friends. And again, this is a running blog….
I’ve gotten a lot of positive feedback and nothing negative. Now this is not to say that people may not have thought, “What the heck is she doing and she’s an idiot.” If they felt that way, they didn’t say it. As I said before, I know that I will pay the price for time off my feet. It is a price that I am more than willing to take though.
Sometimes we put so much internal pressure on ourselves just because we think that we should be doing XYZ and for what? I know for me, I am not someone who will ever win a race. I’m not going to ever be a Boston Qualifier. At this point, I’m not even sure if I will ever get the elusive 4:30 marathon time I’ve been chasing. This is all internal. There is no one yelling at me to go faster, work harder, or run further. To be honest, I think my hubby might like this little break that I’m on even if like me he knows its only temporary.
The end of the year is normal a reflective time for many of us not just about our fitness goals but life in general. For those of us just coming off of fall marathon season, it is also a time to reflect how our performance measured up to the reality of the race. This then can add to the pressure. I’m going to be reflecting on those goals and seeing what if any goals to make for 2017.
I’ll be honest…… As happy as I was to finish NYCM, it was my worst finish time for a marathon for a whole host of reasons I’ve already discussed. Anyway in my mind, I had dreamed that NY would be the best marathon (time wise) that I would or have ever run. That is not the reality. Even though it has been my favorite marathon and I love it, time wise it didn’t measure up. I didn’t measure up. Running a marathon takes a toll not just on the body which it beats up pretty badly, but it also takes a toll on the mind. So just as the body needs a break to recover from running, the mind needs a break from it too.
I was texting a friend who contacted me about my last blog post. She was saying how she had dreamed about running NY here whole life and although she finished, she was not happy with her time either. Since the marathon, she has been pushing herself with her miles and paces. The thing is……. No matter what she does now, it will not change the outcome of the marathon. As I told her though, just finishing is honestly an amazing accomplishment. As another saying goes, if running a marathon was easy; everyone would do it. As true as that statement is, it does not necessarily make it better though. That being said, as with everything in life you must make peace with the past. Our marathon times are in the past. We can’t go back and change them and the would of, could of, and should of’s in life will drive you nuts. So it is time to more forward.
Life is about redemption. Moving forward. The past is important. Lessons should be learned and with any luck mistakes will not be repeated.
There are other races even the same ones if we choose.
There is also time. Time may not heal all wounds ( I think that is the biggest misconception), but it does make things easier. And no amount of running today will change races already run. There will be a time to decide on what paces, distances, and races to run but today is not that day. Next year’s races are just that.