Those who have been around a while know that I became the Accidentally Running Mama by accident.   Hence the name.   This blog and my running really was just to track and share my training for what was supposed to be the one and done Iron Girl Sprint Triathlon.   Obviously it took a life of it’s own and here we are.

Now though I am making a conscious decision to purposely become the accidentally walking Mama.

Say what?????

I’ve talked before how I can’t get a handle on my paces.   Running too fast.   Then needing to stop and walk.   Repeat.   Repeat.  Repeat.   There was a time where I could do negative splits without really looking at my watch.   I just knew by feel and adjusted accordingly.   Now I’m just so jerky with being fast and then slow and can’t get a handle on it.

I am not concerned about pace, so it’s not like I am trying to intentionally run faster paces.   It’s not like I even care about my pace or as we know not training for anything.   I just lost the ability to regulate it.   After a jerky run where my fastest pace was 7:16 (even if it was for a second), I had an epiphany.    I learned to regulate my pace because I was in touch with what my body could do and in tune with it.

Right now I’m out of tune.

At last years New York City Marathon I ended up doing a very brisk powerwalk for most of the race.   This explains my 6:10 finish time.    The thing is when it was over, I still crossed the finish line.   I still got a medal.   I still did what I set out to do.   I felt all the joy, elation, and pride of completing the NYC Marathon.  The next day though, I felt the effects of powerwalking a race that I was trained to mostly run.   Walking got the job done, but it does engage your leg muscles differently than running and I was sore in a different way from running.

I also was thinking about what I need to do to complete the NJ Virtual Parkway challenge.   I’ve got 18 days and about 60 miles to go.    So that averages out to 3.33 miles a day.    I can’t run that every day but I know I can walk it.   A challenge is a challenge and I never back down from one which you can view as good or bad.

I know that when I am out and about, I am going to want to run.   I’ve already gone for 2 walks and had to pull myself back.    I am going to feel like I should be running.   I am going to tell myself… Just this once and try to sabotage this quest to just walk thinking I should be doing more.   The truth is I think this is right want I need to be doing and am planning to stay firm.

I need to go back to the very, very beginning.   Not going back to couch to 5k, but the very very beginning.   Then I can do C25K to start running again.  As it is, I am heavier than I was back in 2013 when I started training for that Sprint Triathlon.   This will allow me to both finish my virtual challenge and get expectations (even internal ones) off the table.

So for now, I am out and about walking.   Not strolling like I’m on the boardwalk, but like I’ve got to get home before the storm comes in.   As a runner, it is important to stay true to your abilities.   True to where your body is on any given day.   True to what you need to do.   Often we push past what we should do in the name of vanity, in the name of meeting a goal, in the name of trying to be better.   Sometimes it works.   Sometimes we crash and burn.

Right now I am on my way to meeting my goal.   I know that I don’t need to do this step back to meet it, but I think it might be the smartest way to both meet it and give my body the reset it needs for my running.   As I said in my last post this is the year to regroup, refocus, and adjust.    I want to run.   I’ve got dreams of another 50K one day (seriously, why can’t I shake that one – I am trying).    If I want to be able to get to where I am going, I need to go back to the beginning.

I’ve also come to the realization that if I want to get back to the longer distances then I’m going to need to incorporate more walking. So this will help me find not just my running stride but my walking stride. Walking with a purpose

So here we go……